The Day I Said Whatever

Somethings you have no control over.  That's hard for me to understand and deal with.  I like to be in control, or at least know what's going on and hand control over to someone else.  I don't like the unknown.  I don't like wishy-washy.  I like things firm and concrete.

Today my sister-in-law and her 4 kids came to live with us for the week.  Her husband got a job here in September and she was just able to get one here, too.  So, I cleaned up the house, bought special groceries, laid out expectations for my kids and hers, and put everything else to rest.

Things did not go as planned for their arrival.  That frustrates me.  But, whatever.  My mother- and father-in-law went out to their old house and picked up the kids.  That frustrates me.  But, whatever.  We don't want the kids using our air mattresses because, although we love them, we have observed that they are not the best with other people's property.  And that frustrates me.  But, whatever.  When my sil did come, she came upstairs to talk to me during my one of two favorite tv shows and I didn't get to see/hear the ending.  That frustrates me.  But, whatever.

Whatever!

Not like a teenager's "whatever!", just an "it's really not a big deal in the long run of things, so whatever."

Yes, potential guests should inform the host of any delays.  Yes, you should not make people travel 3.5 hours to pick up your kids when there were other ways to get them there.  Yes, house guests should respect the rules and property of the home.  Yes, you should see that someone is engaged in an activity and not bother them.  But, really?  How much of that was anything I could control (maybe I could have asked her to talk later, I only have 15-minutes left to this show, and I'd like to see how it ends)?

So, how can I apply this to parenting?

First, I need to allow others to take the wheel sometimes.  Allowing No.1 to plan out and implement just how he is going to clean his room will be fine.  Sure, I would put things away according to category (all the clothes in the hamper then all the Playmobiles in the box then all the books on the shelf), but if he wants to do it randomly, whatever, it'll still get done, right?

Secondly, I need to just let go of the things that don't go according to plan.  If my husband isn't home in time to watch the boys while I teach piano, whatever, my piano student's parents have kids and know sometimes spouses end up late at work for unexpected reasons.

Thirdly, I need to accept that sometimes (actually oftentimes) other people need me.  When No.2 is having a difficult time sleeping due to whatever it is that worries a 2-year old, then I need to put my crochet hook down, turn off the tv, or put a bookmark in and tend to his needs.  Not that I don't already do that, it's just that I often do it begrudgingly.  But, now, whatever.  The yarn will wait, the show will be online tomorrow, the pages can be read later.

So, here's to sometimes giving in.

Here's to, well, whatever.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.