The Day I Was Disrespected

I have an issue with children not fessing up.  I get it.  No one wants to get in trouble.  I didn't either when I was a kid.  If only children could understand that it's not about the item broken or whatever, it's that they have enough respect for it's owner that they tell them what happened.

Today was our Advent.  We had, wait let me count them.......49 people in our basement singing carols and waiting to be fed.  The kitchen was set.  Everything was ready to go.  When the singing was over, they all came up and charged the kitchen with full force.  (By the way, so much left over meat!  I told Mr. we had enough to begin with!)  The kids pretty much ate on the kitchen floor and the adults carried conversations and plates around the first floor and basement.

After a while, some kids went out onto the porch to play, but by 8, everyone was on their way home.

As one of our guest left out of the front door, he asked, "What happened to the bike."

I looked down and No.2's balance bike that Mr. and I spent hours and about $15 creating from a $2 used bike was lying on its side, the wheel completely free of any spokes.  It's not replaceable.

We asked a few of the cousins who were outside playing if they new what had happened.  One said he saw 2 girls ram it over and over again with the tricycle.

Now, it's just a bike.  It's not important.  Although No.2 loved it and Mr. and I were proud of our hard work, it's still a bike.  What is important is that when a child damages something, first, they should stop, and second, they need to tell an adult what happened.

The cousin didn't know the girls name, but through descriptions was able to identify one.  Mr. called her dad.  She said she didn't do it and blamed it on the cousin who ratted on her.  I don't know who to believe, and I probably will never know the truth, and that is bothersome.

I wonder if my children are the same way.  I'd like to think that I've taught them to be honest and to respect other people and their things.  I know there have been some times when No.1 has done something wrong and when confronted he tells the truth (I realize kids are not going to volunteer info), but this case tonight just seemed to have been done without conscience.  It's truly troubling.

I'll have to get over this.  Still, I told Mr. I was never hosting anything again (things were broken last year, too, without ever knowing what happened and who did it).  I know the guest I invited are not responsible because their children were never outside, so it must have been someone who belongs to our Advent group.  Makes me sick......and just sad.  Now I can't trust.  Now when children are over, I'll have to lock everything up.  My home will be like an old person's home.  No fun for kids.

But you know what they say:  Fool me once, shame on you.  Fool me twice, shame on me.

So, here's to no more shame.

Here's to letting things go.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.