The Day I Kept Going

This morning I awoke with an unwanted companion: a headache.  I hate waking up with a headache, it really ruins your whole day.

I schluffed around for about 2 hours, meeting only the basic needs of my children (ie. I gave them food, who cares if they're dressed or not) until I decided that this was ridiculous. I didn't want to take medicine because I felt nauseous already (at first I thought No.1 had shared his virus, but now I think it's my new fish oils from Target), so I decided to do something to take my mind off of the pain in my brain.

I got the boys dressed and we went outside.  No.1 had been spending entirely too much time on Minecraft since being home sick (he goes back to school tomorrow) and No.2 was antsy (what's new) and I needed some fresh air.  As I mowed the lawn, I watched the boys play together.  They are such good boys and get along well for the most part.

I'm glad that I didn't just mope in bed all day.  I know people who do/would.  I'm glad I have the willpower to get up and go even when I feel like crud.  I am so grateful for good boys who seem to sense when I'm not feeling so hot and automatically turn on their best behavior.

So, here's to mind over matter.

Here's to intuitive children.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Thought I Was Done

There are two chores I hate above all others:  putting dishes away and putting laundry away.  I actually enjoy washing dishes (our dishwasher has been broken for over a year) and even folding clothes.  I just hate putting them away.  One day I timed it and it only took 3 minutes to put my laundry away, so I don't know why I hate it so much.  I just do.

With that said, you can imagine my joy as I washed and put away my last dish today and caught up on all my laundry.  Ahhh.  I can finally rest.

Oh, wait.  We still had meals to eat and clothes we were wearing.  My dishes and laundry will never be done.  For the rest of my life, I will always have dishes to wash and clothes to launder.  My work will never be done.

It's not just dishes and laundry that will never be done.  I will forever be a mother.  That is a job that will never end.  And, unlike putting away bowls and pants, I'm thrilled about that.  I sometimes try to imagine my boys all grown up.  I can't.  I really can't.  I don't know why.  I can see myself in 10 years (probably because I've looked the same since I was 2), but I have no idea what my boys will look like.  I try to imagine their personalities and mannerisms.  But I can't.  They change so much there's no telling what they will be like.  I can hope they will be happy, polite, courteous, patient, academic, athletic, self-motivated, confident, and all the other things parents hope for their children, but I can't say for sure how they will be.  I just hope that they turn out they way they were meant to.  Each boy has his own individual eternal purpose here on earth and I pray that as I do my work, I can help them reach their potential.

I see my mother-in-law still parenting her son (not in a weird over-protective-smothering-must-see-Dr.-Phil kind of way, but in a completely-appropriate-caring-advice-giving-when-asked sort of way).  She is a good example to me of how a mother's work is never done.  I can see (and have recently) her get frustrated with some of the decisions her children make, just like I do with my little men.  I see her teach her children by example even now, just like I do with my guys.  I see her offer council when needed, just as I do now.

Even though I cannot imagine my boys all grown-up, I am looking forward to those days, but please don't get here too soon.

So, here's to motherhood.

Here's to working from son up to son down.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Spent More Than I Planned

Today was election day so the schools were closed to be used as poling places.  I had planned a month ago to take the boys on an outing to DC today, but then the government shut down, but then it re-opened, but then No.1 got sick, but then No.1 felt better, so we went!

I had planned on taking the train.  I have never been on a train, neither have the boys (with the exception of amusement park trains and the subway).  Both boys are enamored by trains (well, No.1 says he's not really into them anymore, but he still plays with Thomas), so I thought it would be a special treat.

We walked up to the platform and I purchases a two ride ticket from the machine, activating one ride immediately.  There was a couple on the far side of the track and a single lady on our side.  I asked the lady if she was familiar with the system.  She wasn't.  So, I called the train people on my cell (there are no workers at the train station, everything is electronic) to ask what side of the track I had to be on to go to DC.  The lady asked when I was planning on traveling.

"Um, right now."

"Oh, well, we stopped running our trains at 7:40."

"Well, the website said there are still two more trains.  One at 8:40 and one at 9:02."

"Those are Amtrak trains we have a deal with for later commuters, but you have to have a 10-trip pass then upgrade a $3.00 ticket to ride Amtrak."

"But I just purchased a two-ride pass and activated it."

"You can get that refunded.  But you might have to purchase a ticket for your children.  They can ride our trains for free under 10, but Amtrak charges for 2 and older."

(In tears now) "So, I'd have to purchase Amtrak tickets for my boys?  They can't ride with one of your tickets and the $3 upgrade?"

"I don't know what Amtrak's rules are regarding that, but I think you'll have to purchase tickets."

"Ok, well, thanks."

I was so upset.  I had planned this for, like I said, a month.  I researched it.  I talked to someone on the phone about the train runs.  I had packed a daypack.  I was ready.  The boys were excited.  And now my plan was falling apart all because the train's website said nothing about partnering with Amtrak during those runs (or at least it is unclear because I still can't find reference to such).

I couldn't just go home.  So, I put my $22.20 2-ride pass in my wallet, pulled out my card, and purchased a $101 10-ride pass.  I figured it was good for a year and we'd most likely go again.  I had planned on taking the train because it would be cheaper than driving half way up, parking in a garage, and buying subway passes.  It turned out to cost way more.  But some things are worth it.  Oh, and it turned out I didn't need to buy tickets for the boys or even upgrades for them (another more traveled passenger came to my aid with that info).

I could have just gone home and we could have taken the trip another day, but I really felt like today was the day to do it.  Turned out to be perfect.

We pulled into Union Station and our DC adventure began.  The Postal Museum was right there by the station and the boys had fun learning about the Pony Express, train mail cars, the Inverted Jenny, and creating their own stamps.  We walked to lunch at a great Mexican place a gentleman on the train recommended.  Then we headed to The Mall and hit up the Native American museum (they have a great kids section, too bad the igloo building was closed) then the American History museum.  We walked through the sculpture garden and bought No.1 a Washington DC Minecraft shirt from a street vender then headed home (on the commuter train, this time).

Sometimes plans don't go as planned, sometimes we end up spending more than we planned, sometimes it's all worth it.

So, here's to changing plans.

Here's to fun times.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Sacrificed My Fingers

Well, it should really be The Night I..., but I have a theme going on here, so we'll just go with it.

Anyway, tonight I threaded a hooked needle and went to town sewing together parts of a Sonic the Hedgehog I crocheted for No.1's birthday next month.

Holy Cow!  I never knew you could get nerve damage from stitching.  My fingers were either numb or tingling by the time I was done.  But, it'll all be worth it.

When I made a train for No.2, No.1 asked when I was going to make him something (let it be known that I have in the past crocheted a blanket and two Minecraft characters for him).  I get it, though.  He can see the time I put in to my creations and he wants to feel like he's worth some of that time.  I hope he's thrilled.

So, here's to little surprises.

Here's to lots of time.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Didn't Go to Church

Last night I had every intention of going to church, but then No.1 vomitted.

I am usually the kind of person who goes to church no matter what.  No.1 was born on Monday and I was back to church that Sunday.  I've gone to church with a migraine because I had a duty to fulfill.  I've left my husband at home with a sick child because I had a meeting to attend.  As I write this, I can see how screwey it looks but it worked...for me.

Well, today, I changed that.  It wasn't about me.  No.1 was sick and would need me.  Daddy just wouldn't do.  So, I ran to church early to drop some stuff off, talk to some people about a meeting, and went back home.

No.1 sort of loafed around all day playing Minecraft and spending some time on the pot.  Turned out he didn't really need me to help him wipe his bum or cool his forehead, he just needed me to be there.  He needed me to ask how his tummy was feeling.  He needed me to look at his creations he'd built in the game.  He needed to hear me pray for him.  He needed me. Period.

I am glad that I made the decision to put my church duties aside.  Family should always come first.

So, here's to making family the priority.

Here's to being there.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Was So Happy It Was Over

Soccer is done!!!!  Hooray!!!!!!!

Today was the last game of the season and no one could have been happier than me, except maybe No.1.  We now have our Tuesdays and Saturdays back which means more family time, more play time for No.1, more gas in our car.

As I was reflecting on our week, I really noticed that No.1's schedule has more schedule than not and 6-year olds need some free time to just play and explore.  Well, tonight I think he really felt the weight of his rather rigorous schedule lighten.  He played Legos, he ran around outside, he made paper airplanes.  He just seemed more free.  And I loved watching him do whatever.  He was being a kid.  It was refreshing.

Sometimes I make No.1 do things just because I know that it is good for him (clean his room, gather trash, practice piano), and sometimes I make him do things just because I want him to try it out (eat kale, play a new game, practice piano), and sometimes I make him do things because I sort of hope to live vicariously through him (take dance, join gymnastics, practice piano - oh, wait I did that).  Of course, I don't truly want to live vicariously through my child, I'm not a crazy stage mom (dance was really a movement class and the only thing in town offered to tots, gymnastics was because he is a crazy climber and has no fear), but I do sometimes have him do things because I want him to do them.  Still, I need to evaluate every activity I have him involved in and only keep him going if it really is what is best for him.

I don't know that he'll be involved in a team sport in the spring, but he will start swim team at the beginning of summer (he's taken lessons since 2, but needs something to push his development in the water - oh, and he actually loves swimming; it's like play).  I am happy he played soccer.  He learned a lot about being a member of a team, but I'm ok if he never wants to step on a soccer field again :).

So, here's to no more soccer.

Here's to giving things a try.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.

The Day I Was On Call

This morning at 3:58am the cell phone rang.  I always get anxious when someone calls so early (or late).  In the 2.352 seconds it takes to answer the phone, about 26 "worse case scenarios" rush through my mind.  Luckily, this call was a happy call:  my neighbor was in labor and her girls (2 and 4) were coming over.  By 4:10am the dad and midwife had delivered the girls to my basement futon and went back home to help deliver a new baby boy.

This mother is such a wonderful example to me and I felt so blessed to help out during such a beautiful time.  As I have become friends with this mother down the street over the last year (almost exactly), I have marveled at her parenting skills.  She is so calm and patient.  At first she seems like a bit of an introvert, but is really full of life and love.  She is extremely talented and enjoys sharing her gifts with others.  You can just feel the love she has for her husband and children and can't help but be happy and peaceful when you are around her.

It is partially because of this mother that I have really started to examine my own parenting on a daily basis.  I am so grateful for the opportunity to do better each day.  I am grateful for good examples of women around me.

So, here's to new days.

Here's to new and old friends.

And here's to a Better Mommy Me.